Bending the rules

Bending the rules

March 20, 2013

By: Gina Yoryet Roman

Just a little, sometimes…

Have not written, worked out, prayed, done volunteer work, read for several days, 

and had not focused fully on work issues, till today.

Trying to come up with an excuse, there really isn't any valid justification, it just happened. When balancing my responsibilities, spiritual affairs and work, have to always be lined up at the front. Following those two, there's working out, writing, reading and volunteer work. I always try to hold on to something meaningful to make me feel useful and productive but sometimes I cannot keep up.  

As of last Wednesday exhaustion hit me all of a sudden leaving me completely drained until now. My whole system has not taken this determinant too well. This feeling normally goes away within 24 hours, unlike this time. This sensation went on till Thursday and Friday, and on top of being worn-out, I came down with a sharp throbbing pain on my lower back. Once again, this normally goes on for a day or two at the most. Unalike to now.

On Saturday I got my workout done, came home and spent a couple of hours cleaning, by the time the clock hit 1pm when I was supposed to meet a friend for lunch, I was MAJORLY exhausted that I almost called it quits before hand…

but I didn't.

When I got home, I tried to take a nap at no avail. 

Later that night, I went out with a recently met friend and we stayed out very late, or at least way past our bed time (either one of us is much of a nocturnal person). We each had two glasses of wine, enough to cause a serious hangover the next day.

On Sunday I tried to get some work out of the way before Monday to have a lighter week but the all day long severe headache, allowed me to get very little done. I once again attempted to force in a siesta without succeeding. I instead got ready to go to my friend's place for dinner. 

School was out on Monday because of the holiday, so I met another friend for lunch and brought along my lovely new friend. Later that night, I met that friend again for dinner. After that, we popped by Alfredo's for a sweet dessert. Yummy! Got home at about 10 and instead of heading to bed immediately, I checked my email, did a million things and finally hit the sack at about midnight. 

Yesterday I went to class very early am, I came home, got a little work done and my new friend came over, we hung out for about two hours, went to grab a bite and then I went to class. Later that night we went to Andares VIP movie, just for him to take in the new experience. We got home at almost midnight. At this point my lower back and exhaustion are making me delirious. Plus I detached from my passion/s. Like they say in Mexico, 'Tire la toalla,'  or I threw in the towel responsibility wise for a couple of days. 

In another occasion I would've nagged myself implying, "If you don't remain faithful to your greatest loves,  your passion has not been completely unveiled because you bent the rules." or, "You are not as competitive as you always claim to be."

I would've tortured my mind with all those thoughts before and even now… slightly because I guess it is 'ok' to bend the rules a little every now and again. Only when my dormant body cannot withstand the daily tumultuous routine I set it to accomplish. 

I am using my better judgement and assuming that if all mortals can slow down, why shouldn't immortals (a friend of mine considers me an immortal because I tend to juggle a million things at once), stumble with tiny matters, pause briefly to take a deep breath, and keep going? 

Therefore, my point is, NO, I  am not used to this rhythm and YES, I longed for reading, writing, working out and everything that gives me a sense of being me, but everything is still in place. I twisted things for a few days, broke my curfew and I am very sleep deprived right now, in two days, my alcohol intake was more than what I can normally handle in six months, I ate a lot more than usual, but so what!?

I met a very nice and charming someone whose company was very refreshing for my mind, body and soul. I spent a beautiful five days and enjoyed every single minute of it. I am behind on sleep, the pain on my back has not vanished but I am still enlivened by the turmoil of the rapid events that happened so spontaneously with a better turn out had we planned it. 

Yes, it is definitely ok to bend the rules…sometimes!

So now that I've met my writing goal for today, I am more than ready for some intense zzzzz's.