July 31, 2017
By Gina Yoryet Román
Almost a decade ago,
when I was first introduced to FSSP and Father Romo by chance, I was a little
bit of a mess and my ego was over the roof. An American work colleague I had
known for about two years, and who I later lost touch with, reached out to me
on a fateful day. M. H. must have really needed the information he told me he
was looking for, or he must’ve perceived that despite the fact that I was
rowing hard in my quest, I was leading my boat towards the wrong direction
faith-wise.
I vividly recall my
first meeting with Father Romo and his youthful, yet solemn semblance that put
my weary mind, heart soul and spirit at ease right away. That encounter was the
beginning of a new quest that I had unconsciously fought against all along my
youth. Although that discussion was a clear indication of where to go next, as
the stubborn woman I am, I didn’t allow it to fully sink in. Even then, I still
didn’t stop neglecting the woman I was brought up to be – a woman of faith.
Little did I know that
Father Romo and I shared the same gym. Therefore, when I bumped into him, the
first thought that came to mind was, “Oh, no! I am going to run into that padrecito again! I don’t want to see him
because he is going to force me to go to mass and I really don’t have time for
that now!”
For some time I was
inattentive that in his own way he really put me in my place and brought me
back to my beginning…
So on Saturday night during his
farewell dinner almost ten years later, I was sitting there, this time by
choice in a daze pondering about how I won’t see him again strolling through my
colonia, but more so, wishing I’d run
into him only once again.
As I became more
involved with FSSP and when I was first requested to lead our Spanish program,
it all started making sense. One day last summer at the crack of dawn as the end of our Spanish program drew nearer, God manifested himself to me very clearly and
directly and all the pieces of the puzzle started falling into place. After all
those times when I cried desperately during each state meet or during training all
through the U. S. when I was a young and high-rendering athlete at a loss, I
clearly visualized my purpose. Back then I was unbeknownst to God’s plan for
me because I was oblivious to it all.
In desperate search of finding answers, I excelled in athletics, but despite that, the harder I trained, the more feeble my mind became; the more I sought for my purpose, the more futile I became; the more victories I gained, the more wounded my heart, soul and spirit grew on account of denying myself from his truth. Day after day, amidst that obscurity when la loca de la azotea (the crazy woman upstairs – the mind), always ended wreaking internal havoc. Time after time I constantly prayed at “no avail” asking God to manifest his unconditional love to me by helping me find his way. I begged him to be compassionate of me not based on my appearance, the color of my skin, my social status, or failures, but based on the grounds of being another one of his disoriented and imperfect children who long-sought for his purpose.
In desperate search of finding answers, I excelled in athletics, but despite that, the harder I trained, the more feeble my mind became; the more I sought for my purpose, the more futile I became; the more victories I gained, the more wounded my heart, soul and spirit grew on account of denying myself from his truth. Day after day, amidst that obscurity when la loca de la azotea (the crazy woman upstairs – the mind), always ended wreaking internal havoc. Time after time I constantly prayed at “no avail” asking God to manifest his unconditional love to me by helping me find his way. I begged him to be compassionate of me not based on my appearance, the color of my skin, my social status, or failures, but based on the grounds of being another one of his disoriented and imperfect children who long-sought for his purpose.
On June first, right when we started our program this year, I had to fly out to Mexico City to meet with a client. When I woke up at the crack of dawn my ulterior motive resonated
even stronger when I was
writing the foreword for Habla Cristiano. As I watched my fingers type, I
sensed God’s presence right by my side…
Where he had been all along.
So now that I can finally fathom my meaning I will share it with you: RJ, Ben, David, Daniel,
Christopher, John, Joe, Rodrigo, Roman, as we stand here today, all I can
say is, it has been a brief, yet very enriching and fulfilling ride that
couldn’t have been done without all of you and the “dream team” (the
extraordinary women who share the same vision): Marcela, Berenice Paty Carbajal
and Paty Viera.
We are very grateful to
have shared this journey called life with you for the last eight weeks, so here’s
the perfect message for you!
From time to time in the years to come, I hope you will be treated
unfairly, so that you will come to know the value of justice. I hope that you
will suffer betrayal because that will teach you the importance of loyalty.
Sorry to say, but I hope you will be lonely from time to time so that you don’t
take friends for granted. I wish you bad luck, again, from time to time so that
you will be conscious of the role of chance in life and understand that your
success is not completely deserved and that the failure of others is not
completely deserved either. And when you lose, as you will from time to time, I
hope every now and then, your opponent will gloat over your failure. It is a
way for you to understand the importance of sportsmanship. I hope you’ll be
ignored so you know the importance of
listening to others, and I hope you will have just enough pain to learn
compassion. Whether I wish these things or not, they’re going
to happen. And whether you benefit from them or not will depend upon your
ability to see the message in your misfortunes.
Now commencement speakers are also expected to give some advice.
They give grand advice, and they give some useful tips. The most common grand
advice they give is for you to be yourself. It is an odd piece of advice to
give people dressed identically, but you should — you should be yourself. But you
should understand what that means. Unless you are perfect, it does not mean
don’t make any changes. In a certain sense, you should not be yourself. You
should try to become something better. People say ‘be yourself’ because they
want you to resist the impulse to conform to what others want you to be. But
you can’t be yourself if you don't learn who are, and you can’t learn who you
are unless you think about it.
The Greek philosopher Socrates said, ‘The unexamined life is
not worth living.’ And while ‘just do it’ might be a good motto for some
things, it’s not a good motto when it’s trying to figure out how to live your
life that is before you. And one important clue to living a good life is to not
to try to live the good
life. The best way to lose the values that are central to who you are is
frankly not to think about them at all.
So that’s the
deep advice. Now some tips as you get ready to go to your new school. Over the
last couple of years, I have gotten to know many of you young men pretty well,
and I know you are good guys. But you are also
privileged young men. And if you weren’t privileged when you came here, you are
privileged now because you have been here. My advice is: Don’t act like it!
When you have
been ordained, walk up and introduce yourself to the person who is raking the
leaves, shoveling the snow or emptying the trash. Learn their name and call
them by their name during your time at the school. Another piece of advice: When you pass by people you don’t recognize
on the walks, smile, look them in the eye and say hello. The worst thing that will happen is that you will become known
as the young man who smiles and says hello, and that is not a bad thing to
start with.
You’ve been at a school with just boys. Most of you will be
going to a school with girls. I have no advice for you.
The last bit of advice I’ll give you is very simple, but I think
it could make a big difference in your life. Once a week, you should write a note to someone. Not an email. A
note on a piece of paper. It will take you exactly 10 minutes. Talk to an
adult, let them tell you what a stamp is. You can put the stamp on the
envelope. Again, 10 minutes, once a week. I will help you, right now. I will
dictate to you the first note you should write. It will say, ‘Dear [fill in the
name of a teacher at Cardigan Mountain School].’ Say: ‘I have started at this
new school. We are reading [blank] in English. Football or soccer practice is
hard, but I’m enjoying it. Thank you for teaching me.’ Put it in an envelope,
put a stamp on it and send it. It will mean a great deal to people who — for
reasons most of us cannot contemplate — have dedicated themselves to teaching
middle school boys. As I said, that will take you exactly 10 minutes a week. By
the end of the school year, you will have sent notes to 40 people. Forty people
will feel a little more special because you did, and they will think you are
very special because of what you did. No one else is going
to carry that dividend during your time at school.
So, every now and again
in the years to come, drop me a line and let me know that nothing or no one ever got on your way and that God has prevailed
in you!
We will forever be
indebted with you as we witness you depart. But we shall meet again somewhere
along the line at the right time and place!
As far as you pious men, Father Romo, Father Fryar Father Heenan, Father Lillard, who are serving God
by forming these men, I entice you to keep doing the humble labour that you
have been doing year after year by forging these young men into men of God. I
also cry out to you to walk with them hand in hand and to look at their flaws
through the eyes of God and not through your own eyes in order for them to
fulfill God’s plan to become priests one day sooner rather than later!
God bless!
