The rain will never subside

The rain will never subside

February 13, 2018

By: Gina Yoryet Román

“Pain can change you, but that doesn´t mean it has to be a bad change. Take that pain and turn it into wisdom.”

  

That long-awaited day suddenly peered through my window on the morning of December 2, 2017. For the last three years I had been dreading this life-changing event more than anything. I was very doubtful for several personal reasons that I left in God’s hands. Despite that, I took a step forward and made it. I knew there would be challenges lying ahead, I knew some days I would wake up feeling homesick (for whatever that means because since an early stage of my life, I belonged nowhere), I was aware that my meager domestic skills would intimidate me and I’d feel like running away,  I understood that this 360 degree change would throw me off track momentarily, I recognized that sharing my life with someone on a day-to-day basis would be an invasion of my privacy, something that I cherished more and more with time, I realized that life and my time would NEVER be about me anymore. I was very apprehensive about all of this, but I didn’t come close to my reality once I set foot on this foreign ground.

It has been been ten weeks since that day and I am barely emerging out of that rubble of mixed emotions; fear, joy, anxiety, excitement, promise, but more than anything, fear of the unknown. I stood at an unaquainted cross-road without anywhere to go, or anyone to reach out to, but one person. That 360 degree change took a toll on me.

So one recent morning during a conversation with my sister, I told her, I have to really force myself to snap out of it and do some serious on my knees praying to get a hold of me. With this struggle I have learned that I am gaining knowledge, I am expanding my horizons further than I could ever fathom. But first and foremost, now I know that faith moves mountains. I’ve learned that my greatest strength has come amidst the most agonizing storm. Although I will NEVER be able to change some aspects from this world, and even though the rain may never subside, this can only make me more resilient. I, more than anyone else know that, character is developed amidst the darkness. 

“In the midst of winter,I finally learned that there was within me, an invincible summer.”

“En las profundidades del invierno, finalmente aprendí que en mí interior habitaba un verano invencible.”

Albert Camus

An Unstoppable Force

An Unstoppable Force

Women CAN Have it All –

Not everything at Once

August 8, 2017

By: Gina Yoryet Román

On an article written on July 3, 2014, Moira Forbes touches a very sensitive topic for women. She recounts Indra Nooyi, Pepsi’s CEO’s own narrative about the indecipherable work, life balance puzzle that most women find almost inconceivable to solve.

According to Indra Nooyi, here´s why women can´t have it all.

“having it all' is just an illusion that comes with painful sacrifices and tradeoffs. The biological clock and the career clock are in total conflict with each other.

And that's the time your husband becomes a teenager too, so heneeds you. They need you too. What do you do? And as you grow even more, yourparents need you because they're aging.”

She couldn’t have been more assertive about this controversial topic. Unfortunately, women are indeed at disadvantage with the never-ending vicissitudes of life because of our nature. Sadly, women are put through a series of emotionally and physically staggering obligations throughout their life span: marriage, children, and the time and effort put into relationships. Considering all the aforementioned marriage is some sort of business between two parties who have to keep the reserve from going dry in this joint agreement, and for each party to get their according rate of return. For those women who come from traditional and very close-knit families, we have to always keep our aging parents in mind. Parents play a huge financial responsibility of a certain number of generation x women. Marriages before procreated an average of 5 to 9 children, perhaps more. Many parents didn’t visualize their financial future since their many children (in particular women)were accountable for exchanging roles as they aged;

In addition to the personal aspect, society holds high standards from women, so life, work balance cannot be attained without integrating the most fundamental factors to remain emotionally and physically resilient.

 

Albeit life’s stumbling blocks, we are able to multitask even if “I,” may be put on the back burner. That should never be allowed, as it can be very detrimental to our mental health.

According to Indra Nooyi, women cannot have it all. Nevertheless, nowadays there is clear indication that women can find the long-sought balance, if we have a strong voice to express our own needs to our families, our society, and to the people surrounding us in pursuance of finding support to help us get there.

Women in the workforce add more weight to their existence with the highly demanding and thriving workforce. With these factors in hand, we cannot help feel guilt when we are somewhat absent from our children’s daily activities. Despite all of that, women can indeed have it all, perhaps some chapters of their own books have to be put on hold momentarily, but when we bounce back, we come back stronger than before! Family has to be our number one priority, but even with this huge part of us, women are an unstoppable workforce without a doubt!

The 5 balls of life:

Coca-Cola’s ex-CEO Bryan Dyson’s speech on love, work, family and friendship

[…] Imagine life as a game in which you are juggling some five balls in the air. You name them work, family, health, friends and spirit. And you’re keeping all of these in the air.
You will soon understand that work is a rubber ball. If you drop it, it will bounce back. But the other four balls – family, health, friends and spirit – are made of glass. If you drop one of these, they will be irrevocably scuffed, marked, nicked, damaged or even shattered. They will never be the same. You must understand that and strive for balance in your life.

The greatest Commencement Speech

The greatest Commencement Speech

July 8, 2017

Sometimes when we hit a rough patch in our journey, we want to hear sweet words

And others to always be loving. Although that is great inducement, someone has to step up and be harsh to us to make us wake up and smell the coffee that life is NOT only about happiness, nobody is exempt from hurt. Hence, we must accept it in order to save us a lot of heartache and disappointment. When I was looking through the news earlier this week, I found this very cognizant speech delivered by John Roberts, Supreme Court Chief Justice in the commencement address at his son’s ninth-grade graduation in June 2017. He bestowed the best advice I’ve ever heard, and the best teaching a young person who is getting a glimpse of life can get. Perhaps the rain may never seem to subside, but we have to always bear in mind that we will be ok so long as we hold on to our faith.

I am still in awe!

Chief Justice John Roberts

“Now the commencement speakers will typically also wish you good luck and extend good wishes to you. I will not do that, and I’ll tell you why. From time to time in the years to come, I hope you will be treated unfairly, so that you will come to know the value of justice. I hope that you will suffer betrayal because that will teach you the importance of loyalty. Sorry to say, but I hope you will be lonely from time to time so that you don’t take friends for granted. I wish you bad luck, again, from time to time so that you will be conscious of the role of chance in life and understand that your success is not completely deserved and that the failure of others is not completely deserved either. And when you lose, as you will from time to time, I hope every now and then, your opponent will gloat over your failure. It is a way for you to understand the importance of sportsmanship. I hope you’ll be ignored so you know the importance of listening to others, and I hope you will have just enough pain to learn compassion. Whether I wish these things or not, they’re going to happen. And whether you benefit from them or not will depend upon your ability to see the message in your misfortunes.

Now commencement speakers are also expected to give some advice. They give grand advice, and they give some useful tips. The most common grand advice they give is for you to be yourself. It is an odd piece of advice to give people dressed identically, but you should — you should be yourself. But you should understand what that means. Unless you are perfect, it does not mean don’t make any changes. In a certain sense, you should not be yourself. You should try to become something better. People say ‘be yourself’ because they want you to resist the impulse to conform to what others want you to be. But you can’t be yourself if you don't learn who are, and you can’t learn who you are unless you think about it.

The Greek philosopher Socrates said, ‘The unexamined life is not worth living.’ And while ‘just do it’ might be a good motto for some things, it’s not a good motto when it’s trying to figure out how to live your life that is before you. And one important clue to living a good life is to not to try to live the good life. The best way to lose the values that are central to who you are is frankly not to think about them at all.

So that’s the deep advice. Now some tips as you get ready to go to your new school. Over the last couple of years, I have gotten to know many of you young men pretty well, and I know you are good guys. But you are also privileged young men. And if you weren’t privileged when you came here, you are privileged now because you have been here. My advice is: Don’t act like it!

When you get to your new school, walk up and introduce yourself to the person who is raking the leaves, shoveling the snow or emptying the trash. Learn their name and call them by their name during your time at the school. Another piece of advice: When you pass by people you don’t recognize on the walks, smile, look them in the eye and say hello. The worst thing that will happen is that you will become known as the young man who smiles and says hello, and that is not a bad thing to start with.

You’ve been at a school with just boys. Most of you will be going to a school with girls. I have no advice for you.

The last bit of advice I’ll give you is very simple, but I think it could make a big difference in your life. Once a week, you should write a note to someone. Not an email. A note on a piece of paper. It will take you exactly 10 minutes. Talk to an adult, let them tell you what a stamp is. You can put the stamp on the envelope. Again, 10 minutes, once a week. I will help you, right now. I will dictate to you the first note you should write. It will say, ‘Dear [fill in the name of a teacher at Cardigan Mountain School].’ Say: ‘I have started at this new school. We are reading [blank] in English. Football or soccer practice is hard, but I’m enjoying it. Thank you for teaching me.’ Put it in an envelope, put a stamp on it and send it. It will mean a great deal to people who — for reasons most of us cannot contemplate — have dedicated themselves to teaching middle school boys. As I said, that will take you exactly 10 minutes a week. By the end of the school year, you will have sent notes to 40 people. Forty people will feel a little more special because you did, and they will think you are very special because of what you did. No one else is going to carry that dividend during your time at school.

Enough advice. I would like to end by reading some important lyrics. I cited the Greek philosopher Socrates earlier. These lyrics are from the great American philosopher, Bob Dylan. They’re almost 50 years old. He wrote them for his son, Jesse, who he was missing while he was on tour. It lists the hopes that a parent might have for a son and for a daughter. They’re also good goals for a son and a daughter. The wishes are beautiful, they’re timeless. They’re universal. They’re good and true, except for one: It is the wish that gives the song its title and its refrain. That wish is a parent’s lament. It’s not a good wish. So these are the lyrics from,

Forever Young by Bob Dylan:

May God bless you and keep you always
May your wishes all come true
May you always do for others
And let others do for you
May you build a ladder to the stars
And climb on every rung
And may you stay forever young

May you grow up to be righteous
May you grow up to be true
May you always know the truth
And see the lights surrounding you
May you always be courageous
Stand upright and be strong
And may you stay forever young

May your hands always be busy
May your feet always be swift
May you have a strong foundation
When the winds of changes shift
May your heart always be joyful
May your song always be sung
And may you stay forever young

Thank you!

Bob Dylan