Fireproof
Sunday August 28, 2011
By: Gina Yoryet Roman
An unexpected yet long awaited call on Monday made me reminiscence my late teenage years when I had recently parted High School and partying and pulling all nighters (every single Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday) were my first and foremost priority.
Being a very disoriented rebel without a real cause I wasn’t too fond of school so dropping out of College was my “only” choice to split my time between a part time waitressing job and modeling part time at Bellisima models.
Serving people in the late 1990’s was something to get quite some fun out of because I met many interesting people;
Youngsters my age, hot guys, married couples, senior citizens, etc, but there was one specific group that was very pleasant to work with; the community of Oakmont in Santa Rosa California, just 55 miles north of San Francisco.
Sunday was a day to always look forward to because I always had a chance to see and chat with older people. Interacting with older people is something I’ve always enjoyed because they are full of wisdom,they have already crossed all the roadblocks and learned from life, they have endless interesting stories to tell and they’ve taught me many important lessons.
It was then and there that I met two of the most beloved people in my journey; Hal and Mary Lou White who became my adoptive grandparents. I recall one morning while serving them, he noticed the fatigued and worn out expression on my face. He must’ve taught, “what is this creature doing with her life?” As he held my hand he said to me, “Georgette (the way he has always spelled my name) you are a natural born teacher, why are you wasting your time waitressing?”
It would’ve been too rude and disrespectful to laugh so I replied instead, “Really? You think so?” And it was left at that. My disgust of books and school was not expressed.
Many people will say things to you and they will go in one ear and come out through the other but the comment about me being a “natural born Teacher” was something that always stuck to my mind and somewhere along the line, I forced my stubborn self to go back to school and actually enjoy it.
Yet the most important advice Hal has always given me even to this day is the importance of finding one’s soul mate and commiting to that person forever because marriage is not something to play with.
He said“Pumpkin,” (His nickname for Mary Lou) was his High School sweet heart, from the moment they met they instantly fell in love, they got married shortly after High School and became one for eternity, till the end of time, till death does them apart.
Many years ago this topic didn’t interest me in the least but the more time goes by, the more I can see and understand why their marriage became resistant to absolutely everything. They overcame every single minor obstacle because their love has been greater than anything else.
That love has been the most powerful force in the universe even to this day that Pumpkin is in a rest home because of what that wicked “Señora Fortuna” had been holding in her hands all along.
Three years ago Mary Lou came down with Alzheimer’s and she hasn’t been able to recover. Her mental condition only deteriorates minute after minute, every day her life is slowly slipping out of her hands. She can’t even talk or recognize anyone anymore.
When I talked to Hal on Monday, he was in tears, I could sense the solitude in his soul and the emptiness in his heart and I was speechless. Instead of being of any help, I cried my guts out with him...
for him...
for them. I was angry and felt useless because finding the answer to their problem is not within my reach and I DETEST being out of control and unable to decipher life’s fate.
As for me, I am certain of one thing…
I will never commit to anyone for the wrong reasons, the older I get, the more convinced I am that emotional, spiritual or any type of failure are NOT a choice. .
As we get older our mistakes can bend and break us temporarily but I like to think that they will teach us a lesson and forge us
into better and more committed and loving people.
If “Señora Fortuna” is holding a happy ending (with my soulmate) for me, I would like that union to be fireproof till the end of time.
Spirituality, family, work and business ethics, health and fitness, charity work, reading, playing with words, reflecting and embracing the simplicity of life...
Sunday, August 28, 2011
Friday, August 19, 2011
Where is my stray mojo?
Where is my stray mojo?
FridayAugust 19, 2011
By: Gina Yoryet Roman
It is now Friday night, the first chance for me to transform my weekly thoughts into words…
The truth is that I really did have a little more time than usual to do last week’s reflections (Sunday August 14) but I just couldn’t get my mojo going (mojo = the sense of being alive, joyful, and fully present in the moment. The path to finding your mojo differs for everyone. For some, mojo is a sense of purpose and meaning in your life. For others, it’s reclaiming optimal health or sparking their creativity. Some seekers find mojo by getting in touch with the divine) because of many unexpected and nerve-wracking events, I just couldn’t get myself to jot down a single word.
It all started well last week’s Monday (August 15th), sprinted to they gym at the crack of dawn. Usually instead of thinking about the darkness, I focus on beating my sprint time from the previous day. The day went quite well, I spent time with my babies (my two maltese puppies I got over the summer; Brunito and Pelusita).
Later that night I watched the news about this case of a dead little girl in Estado de Mexico. According to the Journalist, the little girl was ran over by a car a few months back when she had just gotten out of school to run to the park right across the street. The neighbors started noticing bizarre things like the swings moving, strong winds and the whole freaky enchilada, YIKES!
The Journalist went to the park at midnight to see if he could catch something creepy on camera and so he did! I am usally very skeptical about those things but I could clearly see the little girl’s silhouette right when he focused the camera so I FREAKED OUT! The next morning I was in such panic that I called the gym trainer (who works out at the same time time)to pick me up.
Thank God he came and got me, otherwise I wouldn’t have been able to drag myself out of the house. LOL! Just as my fear started dissipating slowly, I saw some tragic news about women and murders and I felt so much anxiety that I had to get my mind distracted with something else.
On Wednesday I thought I was more at ease until I came back from the gym. Right when I walked in the door at 6:30am my landline started ringing, My first thought was, “Perhaps it’s one of my sisters but they are two hours earlier.” It was a bit odd even more so when the caller ID read “Private number.” I had just turned the computer on to start writing because I was very eager so when I picked up it was a man panting and screaming in panic. He kept saying something like, “help me, I’m being kidnapped, they are throwing me into a pickup, help, help!”
My heart dropped to the floor and my body went cold, I literally started shivering. Two or three seconds later I told myself, “Ok, snap out of it, this is not real.” And so it wasn’t because as I listened to that wicked voice again, I couldn’t hear the least tinge of panic. If that man had to make a living out of acting, he would’ve been homeless by now.
Throughout the day the phone rang a few more times and I was too hesitant to pick it up when the caller id, read “Private number.”
On Thursday in the midst of my weekly chaos I was trying to beat into my head that fear is nothing but an abstract idea but I still felt YUCK! I sprinted back home from the gym as I was expecting my sister to call me at 8am after I emailed her telling her of my happenings. Thank God for sisters! I got home, fed my babies, cleaned their poop, took them out for a walk but Oh Lord, they are more than a handful! They run like crazy all over the place so I rushed out the house leaving my keys on the table! I locked myself out at 6:45am!! So I had to wait until work hours to call a locksmith to make sure I talked to my sister before I left to go to work.
And so we did have a brief chat which I was very glad for because she beholds this kind of divine power to soothe one’ soul. At that moment I wished she were here so she could sit right beside me to tell me a joke, to talk to me about our childhood, to nag at me or to just be there keeping me company.
Unlike many people who are terrified of being alone, I’ve always been one to cherish the quiet moments of my solitude because that is exactly where I find peace. My alone moments give me the opportunity to strategize, plan and act. That is my time to reflect and empower my mind and soul and to reach down to the spiritual me. To look at the woman in the mirror and ask her how I can be more in control of my actions and thoughts, how I can be more disciplined, thorough, more agressive and how I can hold on to life with one grip to reach all my lifetime goals, how I can have more expectations of me and ONLY me and how to be more aware of other people’s needs, like the people at Acortar Distancias.
As it is in my nature to NEVER sit down and be in control of every aspect of my life (for better), sometimes it feels as though I am so out of sequence but despite all those setbacks I keep trying in my day to day battle. Sometimes it is very easy to give up and I can see why many do…
What is one to do in this constant roller coaster when emotions, fear, lack of motivation, temptation and “bad influence” seem to take over?
I pray and give it all to a much more powerful force in the universe that will take it all away and help me find true inner peace.
FridayAugust 19, 2011
By: Gina Yoryet Roman
It is now Friday night, the first chance for me to transform my weekly thoughts into words…
The truth is that I really did have a little more time than usual to do last week’s reflections (Sunday August 14) but I just couldn’t get my mojo going (mojo = the sense of being alive, joyful, and fully present in the moment. The path to finding your mojo differs for everyone. For some, mojo is a sense of purpose and meaning in your life. For others, it’s reclaiming optimal health or sparking their creativity. Some seekers find mojo by getting in touch with the divine) because of many unexpected and nerve-wracking events, I just couldn’t get myself to jot down a single word.
It all started well last week’s Monday (August 15th), sprinted to they gym at the crack of dawn. Usually instead of thinking about the darkness, I focus on beating my sprint time from the previous day. The day went quite well, I spent time with my babies (my two maltese puppies I got over the summer; Brunito and Pelusita).
Later that night I watched the news about this case of a dead little girl in Estado de Mexico. According to the Journalist, the little girl was ran over by a car a few months back when she had just gotten out of school to run to the park right across the street. The neighbors started noticing bizarre things like the swings moving, strong winds and the whole freaky enchilada, YIKES!
The Journalist went to the park at midnight to see if he could catch something creepy on camera and so he did! I am usally very skeptical about those things but I could clearly see the little girl’s silhouette right when he focused the camera so I FREAKED OUT! The next morning I was in such panic that I called the gym trainer (who works out at the same time time)to pick me up.
Thank God he came and got me, otherwise I wouldn’t have been able to drag myself out of the house. LOL! Just as my fear started dissipating slowly, I saw some tragic news about women and murders and I felt so much anxiety that I had to get my mind distracted with something else.
On Wednesday I thought I was more at ease until I came back from the gym. Right when I walked in the door at 6:30am my landline started ringing, My first thought was, “Perhaps it’s one of my sisters but they are two hours earlier.” It was a bit odd even more so when the caller ID read “Private number.” I had just turned the computer on to start writing because I was very eager so when I picked up it was a man panting and screaming in panic. He kept saying something like, “help me, I’m being kidnapped, they are throwing me into a pickup, help, help!”
My heart dropped to the floor and my body went cold, I literally started shivering. Two or three seconds later I told myself, “Ok, snap out of it, this is not real.” And so it wasn’t because as I listened to that wicked voice again, I couldn’t hear the least tinge of panic. If that man had to make a living out of acting, he would’ve been homeless by now.
Throughout the day the phone rang a few more times and I was too hesitant to pick it up when the caller id, read “Private number.”
On Thursday in the midst of my weekly chaos I was trying to beat into my head that fear is nothing but an abstract idea but I still felt YUCK! I sprinted back home from the gym as I was expecting my sister to call me at 8am after I emailed her telling her of my happenings. Thank God for sisters! I got home, fed my babies, cleaned their poop, took them out for a walk but Oh Lord, they are more than a handful! They run like crazy all over the place so I rushed out the house leaving my keys on the table! I locked myself out at 6:45am!! So I had to wait until work hours to call a locksmith to make sure I talked to my sister before I left to go to work.
And so we did have a brief chat which I was very glad for because she beholds this kind of divine power to soothe one’ soul. At that moment I wished she were here so she could sit right beside me to tell me a joke, to talk to me about our childhood, to nag at me or to just be there keeping me company.
Unlike many people who are terrified of being alone, I’ve always been one to cherish the quiet moments of my solitude because that is exactly where I find peace. My alone moments give me the opportunity to strategize, plan and act. That is my time to reflect and empower my mind and soul and to reach down to the spiritual me. To look at the woman in the mirror and ask her how I can be more in control of my actions and thoughts, how I can be more disciplined, thorough, more agressive and how I can hold on to life with one grip to reach all my lifetime goals, how I can have more expectations of me and ONLY me and how to be more aware of other people’s needs, like the people at Acortar Distancias.
As it is in my nature to NEVER sit down and be in control of every aspect of my life (for better), sometimes it feels as though I am so out of sequence but despite all those setbacks I keep trying in my day to day battle. Sometimes it is very easy to give up and I can see why many do…
What is one to do in this constant roller coaster when emotions, fear, lack of motivation, temptation and “bad influence” seem to take over?
I pray and give it all to a much more powerful force in the universe that will take it all away and help me find true inner peace.
Monday, August 8, 2011
There is no room for failure
There is no room for failure
By: Gina Roman
Monday August 8, 2011
The economy is going down once again, with that Dow Jones is at one of its 9th lowest in U. S. history and at its lowest since December 1st 2008 according to yahoo news.
That always makes me ponder on the fact of what it’s like for those who invest in the stock market, the feeling they must get when their stocks pump to the highest value.
What about when the stocks hit the bottom though? Was all the risk worth the effort? What about the feeling of having failed financially?
There are millions out there who are going through turmoil at this precise moment because their assets are at high stake due to this shaky economy…
Can stockholders foresee what’s lying ahead? Perhaps they cannot, otherwise they wouldn’t risk so much because of their fear of failure? Failure of losing their finances, failing to their families, failure to not being able to predict the ups and downs of economy.
As much as people may fear failing, it seems as though they always clamor for money, possessions and prestige. Do they realize that all of that is transient? As money can be lost, possessions wear out and go out of style. Position and prestige are fleeting prizes in life’s tug-of-war.
Why not search for spiritual understanding, dreams and goals and incline towards the quiet solitude of one’s soul instead?
These are the things that make a human being truly wealthy, wealthy in wisdom, serenity, hope and joy.
I have not once known of a single stock on the stock market that guarantees that kind of dividend.
My understanding of Life is about being ambitious (Not inclined towards a materialistic aspect), setting goals and expectations, accomplishing them and NOT allowing any gaps for failure to filter in because once it manages to get in, it is like an illness, hard to get rid of, unless one uses all their might to do otherwise. Everyone always sets goals especially as we get older; I personally at this point in life cannot allow myself to fail mentally, emotionally, financially, or spiritually. I do not in ANY way Intend for perfection, what I mean is that my past experiences have definitely helped me get to know myself better, to define the “I” now, to determine what NOT to do in the future and more so, they’ve forged me into a much stronger person.
The other night I was talking to one of my students and we mentioned the fact that we have the same concept of life, to NOT allow failure to sink in. Sometimes it can be frustrating because things seem to happen in a rather slow motion and it is in our nature to want immediate results (sometimes we neglect to accept nothing but the best without even trying).
Many times I look back at the end of 2008 when every single area of my life was shattered, all of 2009 was spent struggling to collect all the tiny pieces and put them together, and part of 2010 when it finally dawned on me that too much time had been wasted feeling lost and empty, I sought for a million ways to get back in tune with life, set goals and expectations of “me” and take the rein of my existence.
Writing has always been one of my passions in life, once I set a goal to write professionally so when I started writing for a magazine and a newspaper, I was thrilled but that joy didn’t last too long as I was bombarded with a million tasks and I was being pulled in different directions (I always have to split myself up between Teaching, Translating, Writing and Health and Fitness).
Sometimes I want to bang my head against the wall for letting the opportunity of writing profesionally slip out of my hands but at the same time there will always be opportunities, plus it didn’t fulfill me completely since I’ve always wanted to do reflective writing so I can pore my heart out and connect with the world.
After cleaning up all the clutter in my mind, I concluded that translating/interpreting needed to be put on my top list as it can bring many great opportunities business wise. But then teaching jumps in and like someone once said to me during my youth years when I was a rebel with MANY causes, “You are a natural born teacher.” And then Health and Fitness comes in. Perhaps I am not ready to drop any of them just yet…
At this moment in life I still haven’t figured out which of my passions will bring me the most joy and fulfillment nor which one would be the most profitable and worth my while. To this day, I still haven’t maximized my potential to the highest. All I know is that as exhausted as I sometimes may be (my days usually start at 4:30 am), there will NEVER be any room for failure because I am a MexiCAN.
LOSE/WIN
I have known the pain of failure, frustration, disappointment, defeat,
BECAUSE
I have taken a chance on winning, succeding, achieving…
It takes a lot of the first to get some of the second.
Natasha Josefowitz
By: Gina Roman
Monday August 8, 2011
The economy is going down once again, with that Dow Jones is at one of its 9th lowest in U. S. history and at its lowest since December 1st 2008 according to yahoo news.
That always makes me ponder on the fact of what it’s like for those who invest in the stock market, the feeling they must get when their stocks pump to the highest value.
What about when the stocks hit the bottom though? Was all the risk worth the effort? What about the feeling of having failed financially?
There are millions out there who are going through turmoil at this precise moment because their assets are at high stake due to this shaky economy…
Can stockholders foresee what’s lying ahead? Perhaps they cannot, otherwise they wouldn’t risk so much because of their fear of failure? Failure of losing their finances, failing to their families, failure to not being able to predict the ups and downs of economy.
As much as people may fear failing, it seems as though they always clamor for money, possessions and prestige. Do they realize that all of that is transient? As money can be lost, possessions wear out and go out of style. Position and prestige are fleeting prizes in life’s tug-of-war.
Why not search for spiritual understanding, dreams and goals and incline towards the quiet solitude of one’s soul instead?
These are the things that make a human being truly wealthy, wealthy in wisdom, serenity, hope and joy.
I have not once known of a single stock on the stock market that guarantees that kind of dividend.
My understanding of Life is about being ambitious (Not inclined towards a materialistic aspect), setting goals and expectations, accomplishing them and NOT allowing any gaps for failure to filter in because once it manages to get in, it is like an illness, hard to get rid of, unless one uses all their might to do otherwise. Everyone always sets goals especially as we get older; I personally at this point in life cannot allow myself to fail mentally, emotionally, financially, or spiritually. I do not in ANY way Intend for perfection, what I mean is that my past experiences have definitely helped me get to know myself better, to define the “I” now, to determine what NOT to do in the future and more so, they’ve forged me into a much stronger person.
The other night I was talking to one of my students and we mentioned the fact that we have the same concept of life, to NOT allow failure to sink in. Sometimes it can be frustrating because things seem to happen in a rather slow motion and it is in our nature to want immediate results (sometimes we neglect to accept nothing but the best without even trying).
Many times I look back at the end of 2008 when every single area of my life was shattered, all of 2009 was spent struggling to collect all the tiny pieces and put them together, and part of 2010 when it finally dawned on me that too much time had been wasted feeling lost and empty, I sought for a million ways to get back in tune with life, set goals and expectations of “me” and take the rein of my existence.
Writing has always been one of my passions in life, once I set a goal to write professionally so when I started writing for a magazine and a newspaper, I was thrilled but that joy didn’t last too long as I was bombarded with a million tasks and I was being pulled in different directions (I always have to split myself up between Teaching, Translating, Writing and Health and Fitness).
Sometimes I want to bang my head against the wall for letting the opportunity of writing profesionally slip out of my hands but at the same time there will always be opportunities, plus it didn’t fulfill me completely since I’ve always wanted to do reflective writing so I can pore my heart out and connect with the world.
After cleaning up all the clutter in my mind, I concluded that translating/interpreting needed to be put on my top list as it can bring many great opportunities business wise. But then teaching jumps in and like someone once said to me during my youth years when I was a rebel with MANY causes, “You are a natural born teacher.” And then Health and Fitness comes in. Perhaps I am not ready to drop any of them just yet…
At this moment in life I still haven’t figured out which of my passions will bring me the most joy and fulfillment nor which one would be the most profitable and worth my while. To this day, I still haven’t maximized my potential to the highest. All I know is that as exhausted as I sometimes may be (my days usually start at 4:30 am), there will NEVER be any room for failure because I am a MexiCAN.
LOSE/WIN
I have known the pain of failure, frustration, disappointment, defeat,
BECAUSE
I have taken a chance on winning, succeding, achieving…
It takes a lot of the first to get some of the second.
Natasha Josefowitz
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