The flesh and bone ones Do
October 25, 2013
By: Gina Yoryet Roman
Miguel Bose says that they don’t , but I’d have to rebuttal that because everyone is made of flesh and bone, therefore we all have feelings.
From a very early age on, girls and boys are raised very differently, at least in México and other Latin American countries. Today while at my doctor’s office we discussed the patterns society takes towards boys and girls. Since we are toddlers women are given the ‘ok’ to cry at under any circumstances, when we fall, when we want something, when we miss our parents, when we are not ‘cute,’ when we like a boy but he doesn’t reciprocate, when other girls are catty. later as teenagers, every time of the month, when we are angry, when we get our heart broken, when something doesn’t go well at work, when we are depressed, angry, irritated, frustrated, when we are having a bad hair day, later when we reproduce, when our children are not complying to the rules, because we gained too much weight, because we are not good enough to society due to our ‘full time’ job as moms, or for numerous reasons, like the sprite commercial, ‘Las Mujeres lloran,’ or ‘Por que las mujeres lloran por todo.’
According to Octavio Paz’ ‘Mexican Masks,’ women are regarded as the weak sex without a voice of our own who are always concealed behind the shadow of men and no more. As much as some females may fight for feminism, there are particular tasks that women don’t dare get into or are not willing to do just yet, I mean, getting down and dirty is ‘for boys.’
On the other hand, men are considered ‘weak’ when/if they show any sign of emotion. Under the same scenarios as a girl, they are obligated to absorb their feelings to avoid looking or sounding feeble.
Not a single woman wants to witness the men in her life crying or being more sensitive and emotional than her. I do counterclaim that shedding a few tears here and there, are proof that we are all flesh and bone and that’s what makes us human. I rather be with a man who expresses his feelings because our bond would be stronger. Men whose soul is hard to pierce, fear who they are for a number of reasons and they end up repressing their emotions. For instance, one of the most important men in my existence sheltered himself behind an iron mask all his life. He deeply cared about his loved ones in his own peculiar way but he taught me to NEVER under ANY circumstances cry or mirror any emotions to society whatsoever because that is/was a sign of weakness.
“Whenever something goes wrong and you break down, do it behind the four walls of your privacy, once you have let it all out, you go out there and confront the world with an intact “YOU” and you will prevail.”
I turned a blind eye to that priceless advice, subdued to my emotions, I literally became a nonstop weeping Madgalena (Mary Magdalene, original Greek Μαρία ἡ Μαγδαληνή), or Mary of Magdala and sometimes The Magdalene, is a religious figure in Christianity. She has been called the second-most important woman int he New Testament after Mary, the mother of Jesus. Mary Magdalene traveled with Jesus as one of his followers. She was present at Jesus' two most important moments: the crucifixion and the resurrection. Within the four Gospels, the oldest historical record mentioning her name, she is named at least 12 times, more than most of the apostles. The Gospel references describe her as courageous, brave enough to stand by Jesus in his hours of suffering, death and beyond.
Since the last three years I have become more serene, content, comfortable in my own skin despite all the physical and emotional hardships throughout my journey. It was a long time coming but I told a friend of mine the other day, “true, we may not be able to control some predicaments, we definitely cannot force anyone else to love us either, but I accept obstruent obstables I have encountered because that’s what makes me human. I may never be able to decipher all the mysteries lying behind and ahead but I no longer consider them tragic, I’ve purged my mind, body and soul, and let go of a lot of pain and it is very liberating, as if I had just taken five hundreds pounds off my shoulders.
I do prefer to be around men and beings who are transparent, a little sensitive, emotional and forgiving, someone who's got an open heart, someone who welcomes ups and downs and that who's set himself free from all prior disappointments and wants to embrace love once again without looking back. Like Tina Turner stated, “Sometimes you have to let everything go - purge yourself. If you are unhappy with anything - whatever is bringing you down - get rid of it. Because you will find that when you are free, your true creativity, your true self comes out.
When I sought for ‘Me and let go of the weeping woman’ I regained the ‘Me,’ the person who will be close to me all my life.
The flesh and bone ones (men) Do cry!
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