Friday, September 14, 2012

The Power of Healing


The Power of Healing
September 14, 2012
By: Gina Yoryet Román


I’ve been amidst a whirlwind of emotions, caught in an internal roller coaster of sentiments which’s got me holding on to a fine line trying to keep my sanity. My mind was very disturbed that I didn’t set my weekly health and fitness goals.

Today was week number two of physical therapy but instead of putting me at ease, PANIC has struck once again since I still go through down moments. For instance yesterday my entire body was swollen and tense due to the lack of movement and because I couldn’t escape from unnecessary, mindless, compulsive, impulsive and emotional cravings. I stuffed myself without having compassion for my temple, causing stomach illness and guilt after the fact.

As I welcome the promise of a new day, I hop out of bed feeling undefeatable, like I could sprint a whole 42.1k as I did in the good ´ole days. I tell myself, “This injury and unbearable pain will only put a temporary halt to my life, I will not give this unexpected and unfortunate illness the chance to defeat the citius, altius fortius within.”

The next day, pain returns and I can’t even walk, causing more emotional pain and I cannot avoid recurring to junk food. Being a stranger in my own body and being unable to decipher the solution to alleviate the restraint that is robbing me from mental peace and sleep is wreaking more havoc. Sometimes I wish I could go inside it with a nano microscope to nail down the issue and stop the pain for good.

When pain hits, it interrupts my lifestyle, as the hyper active person who cannot sit still for a single second, I feel my soul withering. My crack of dawn workouts had to be put on the back burner at least until my therapy is over with. Despite those early rises being detrimental to my mental health, they were my morning coffee that wired me up all day long.

Unlike now, I felt very sleepy and my energy has plummeted to the lowest ever almost all week long. Despair, anxiety, lack of motivation and hope kept haunting me, which is why this led me to question the therapist, “Does this really help, and can you really see improvement in other athletes you’ve treated?” She said, “Certainly, but keep in mind that this process requires patience and consistence.”

I reckon that patience has NEVER been one of my traits consequently I am anxious to see the outcome. This thought keeps coming back, “How am I to help women get motivated to get into the sexiest shape of their lives?” When I can’t get all my small particles together and encourage myself?

Albeit everything being up in the air, at this precise moment I am feeling very positive because my knee didn’t throb in pain all day long. AND because when people get tired of hearing the same long and boring story over and over, when all else fails, I implore to God because I know that sooner or later my prayers will be heard and that he is holding on to me every single second.

I can assure that I am in good hands. As a licensed Insurance Agent when I worked at Allstate, out motto was, “With Allstate you’re in good hands,” to gain our customers’ trust. With this in hand, I’ve been in two divine hands ALL my life, my faithful companion is always by my side working his magical powers, making amazing miracles that NO human being can.

So tonight my soul can be at ease because he’s got my back! And because I just came across this great website, Two Months to Better Knees. I will do whatever it takes to get my knee back in shape and to keep my right one injury free to perhaps one day in the near future do a pain-free thirty minute stroll. Forget the high-rendering competitions, I am quite satisfied that my body did its job for twelve years. Finally I can close that episode and say, “I’ve been there, done that, therefore my life is now taking a different route with the power of healing that can be miraculous!” 

 ‘I won’t leave you nor forsake you’

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