"Princesas y Guerreras"

"Princesas y Guerreras”
June 12, 2011
By: Gina Roman


A while back, someone sent me this document “The Good ‘Ole days” -
The Good wife’s Guide.
This guide was actually published in a magazine a few years before the Women’s Rights Movement in the U. S. (May 13, 1955).

Back then females worldwide were true warriors and women nowadays have to be very grateful for being able to have more freedom although society’s glass ceiling will always be present in many aspects since the world is reigned by a “macho” society.

When I used to write for “The Lake Chapala Review,” I once interviewed a good friend of mine who has been living in Guadalajara since the early 1960’s and while she narrated all the changes and happenings, I sat silently listening to an endless list of interesting yet unpleasant experiences for women.

Unlike now, women before were not allowed to wear jeans, they couldn’t even vote, there weren’t as many female professionals. Even if they graduated from college they “weren’t allowed” to actually work. They were expected to only be housewives. With this I am not implying that being a housewife isn’t any good, I mean that house work entails several unpaid and unrewarded duties.

Before married women were legally dead in the eyes of the law, they were not allowed to vote, they had to submit to laws when they had no voice in their formation, married women had no property Rights, husbands had legal power over and responsibility for their wives to the extent that they could imprison or beat them without impunity, divorce and child custody laws favored men, giving no rights to women, women had to pay property taxes although they had no representation in the levying of these taxes, most occupations were closed to women and when women did work they were paid ONLY a minimum fraction of what men earned, they were not allowed to enter professions such as medicine or law, women had no means to gain an education since no college or university would accept women students, with only a few exceptions, women were not allowed to participate in the affairs of the church, women were robbed of their self-confidence and self-respect, and were made totally dependent on men.

As much disadvantage as there will always be for us, there are many smart, talented, successful, independent and amazing women who have not let any obstacle threaten or intimidate them and they’ve made a big difference in society
An excellent example of these women is Alma Chavez, (The Woman “The bad guys fear the most.”) Juarez Special Agent who is fighting femicide, drugdealing, violence, etc. in Ciudad Juarez Chihuahua.

There’s also Mariana Juarez, “La Barbie,” a 31 year old Mexican Boxer who comes from a low class family in México City, yet she has never let anything put a halt to her dreams.

There is also the powerful Ana Guevara, a professional runner and Lorena Ochoa, one of the best female golf players.

There are many more successful women all over the world who are a good example to society and more important, to other women warriors.

“Lead your Heart, Don't Follow it."

I was in the mood of taking a brief break and
dropping a quick line but I'm not fully coordinated
at this moment so I'll share this beautiful piece of
writing someone sent me a while ago.



“Lead your Heart, don't follow it."
May 5, 2011


“The human heart is the most deceitful of all things, and desperately wicked. Who really knows how bad it is? But I, the Lord, search all hearts and examine secret motives. I give all the people their due rewards, according to what their actions deserve”(Jeremiah 17:9,10, NLT). Feelings! We hear about them often. How many sentences do we being with “I feel” or “I don’t feel?” There is some cause for concern when relationships, especially marriages, are based on feelings. One of my favorite lines from the move “Fireproof” says that “you have to lead your heart.” That is powerful. The heart is the wellspring of our affective lives – our feelings. Our hearts will deceive us. Because the heart, our self, will try to focus our minds on “What I want” and miss important and even obvious aspects of what is best for a relationship. That is the danger of loving and living by feelings. But a mind fixed on serving Christ and others will lead our hearts to pure love, pure joy and ultimate fulfillment. Think about this! What does it mean to surrender our heart to Christ? It is Laying down ourself and acknowledging that life isn’t all about me and my feelings.
Perhaps we need to rethink some things. Maybe loving God, our spouse and others with our hearts isn’t enough.
Consider this: “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.” The second is this: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” There is no commandment greater than these” (Mark 12;30, 31 NIV).
Love involves far more than our heart. It includes everything we are.
Lead your heart by deciding to love your spouse – and those around you – unconditionally like God loves us...

God is watching.

Do life experiences define the “I” now?

Do life experiences define the “I” now?
June5, 2011
By: Gina Roman



This Journal entry was started on Thursday at about 10am when I felt this nostalgia and an unexpected urge to write. I immediately dropped everything and rushed to my pc to type and before long, my fingers started creating words on their own while hearing this inner voice dictating my weekly reflections. (Computers and my faithful companions -“my writers bibles”) make life worhwhile. “What a Writer Needs,” By: Ralph Fletcher, “Rules for Writers,” By Diana Hacker, and “Writing with Style,” By Sue Young.

People always ask me how I'm able to find something to write every week. Sometimes the idea comes as a flash of insight out of the blue, but most weeks I find inspiration in my conversations with others, my own struggles to lead a good life and project good vibes to those surrounding me, when I’m at the gym in the early hours or while driving to twenty different places in one day, or simply because writing is one of my passions in life and it just comes natural to me. And like the Pan American games slogan says, “La fuerza de tu pasión te hace imparable.” the strength of your passion makes you unstoppable.


On Wednesday night I stopped by a friend’s house and while I waited for her to come downstairs, the fish tank caught my attention. I attentatively observed the fish sitting there other than not doing a single thing, they were looking right at me. Perhaps there were not even aware of my presence as they lazed in the water. Perhaps this picture doesn’t symbolize any importance to many but I always look at the whole Picture of things so my mind started wandering to many years ago when I was much younger.

One of the biggest and most important experiences I have ever accomplished was compete in the Women’s Track and Field and Cross Country teams. I made that happen because I desired it with all my heart but that was the only event happening....

Many things I wanted “weren’t happening” so one night I lay in bed and pondered on why my life was idle like a huge plank of wood in a river without draught. Deep down I knew that I was letting life go by and I wasn’t taking much action. For many years I lingered around just like the fish in the tank.
Since that night I decided to lock procrastination in and leave it behind by taking a stand and make things happen. I started doing volunteer work at an Animal Shelter; walking the dogs, bathing them, feeding them, playing with them, cleaning their cages, feeding and petting the bunnies brought so much peace and joy that to this day it has been one of the best things I’ve done for me and for those amazing creatures.

I also became part of Latina Leadership Network in which we mentored younger Latinas to find their route in life; personally, spiritually, professionally, etc. I also joined a catholic youth group that taught young people morals, values, and helped us stay focused in life. These experiences and many more helped me define the person I am now but I always ask myself, "is this it?"

Looking back at my life in Sacramento it was a very idle and monotonous existence and I would’ve unconsciously conformed with that. Perhaps that was good enough at that place and moment.

Unlike my stay here where I’ve faced many challenges that have forged me into a more responsable and humane woman.
Now that I’ve been in México for six years, I am very grateful for all the incomparable moments I’ve lived. Had I stayed in the U. S., I would’ve neglected to see “another” life, another world. I would’ve neglected to appreciate the true beauty of life and not accepted the fact that there won’t always be someone doing everything else for me (even though I am not the youngest in my family, my sisters always did everything for me; cleaning, my laundry, my food, my Shopping – I didn’t have to lift one single finger because I was always the spoiled one).

Had I stayed in the U. S, I wouldn’t have challenged myself to strive for better and maximize my potential.

Had I not made it to México I would’ve NEVER understood others; people here work harder to barely make it. Neither would I have been able to see and appreciate the fact that those who have less are the ones who give the most even though for many, their dreams and goals are only an abstract idea because they will never have the financial means to accomplish them.

Being here has made me be aware of other people’s needs and realize that I had a bit “too much” in the U. S. like; running out of gas was out of the question, having to worry about sky high phone fees was not an issue either, worrying about not having a car never even crossed my mind, my car was always a few steps away.

México has taught me that I can withstand and overcome many obstacles that will slow down my journey temporarily but they will NEVER defeat me despite the fear I’ve felt every morning before I hop out of bed. THANK God it is only an abstract idea.

Here I’ve gotten to know myself more than ever, what makes me if not radiant in happiness, I've at least found what gives me peace and I can cherish those quiet moments to meditate and ponder on how I can become a better being and be ready for what is lying ahead, what mission awaits at the end of my journey.

And it’s definitely helped me find and stick to my sanctuary which are writing, my workouts, my family (even though they are thousands of miles away), doing charity work, reading, fighting day by day to reach the goals I set, to defeat my physical pain.....


In my life now I am juggling many more activities than I was ever able to imagine. And although those activities leave me very little time for me sometimes, I am happy with the woman I have become, with the things that I’ve accomplished. The mental discipline that I’ve developed, somethingI’ve always long for. A mental discipline much more intense than when I used to turn on to “nun mode” back in college when I was in the Women’s Athletic team, as much as I loved to party out, I didn’t do it because that was going to deteriorate my performance.

Perhaps I would have never impulsed myself to accomplish more.
Maybe I would’ve never met wonderful women like A. W. C. P., M. S., M. E. T., .C. W., J. D,
Perhaps I would have never gotten out of my gigantic bubble and known that famine is a major issue and how many hungry people linger on the streets.

Maybe I would’ve never stopped putting “I” first. Someone once told me, “When the world stops being selfish and thinking about “me,” “me,” “me” that’s when the world will change.
Perhaps I wouldn't even haven known what the population is in México and out of those milions of women how many prostitute themselves because of their desperate need to come out of misery, or much less would I have known the rate of alcoholism.

Perhaps I would’ve never stopped complaining that I didn’t have enough clothes, shoes, a nicer and newer car.
Maybe I would’ve never felt exhaustion at the end of the day because I would be too busy getting bored since “there wasn’t anything to do.”
Perhaps I would’ve never known how to appreciate the colors, the life, the joy, the real “simple life” in Mexico.
Perhaps I would’ve never been so interested in knowing so much about “me,” my world, my culture, this country, my surroundings.
Perhaps I would’ve always stuck to wearing a meager variety of colors, Black, navy blue, dark gray, and brown.
Perhaps I would’ve always neglected to read more literature or enjoyed more Mexican/Hispanic writers, like Octavio Paz, Carlos Cuauhtemoc Sánchez, Gabriel García Márquez, or I would’ve stuck to Georgia O’keeffe instead of appreciating Frida Kahlo, Diego Rivera, etc,

Perhaps I would’ve never defined my dreams, goals and my passion. Perhaps I would’ve never felt motivated to lead a healthier lifestyle, perhaps I wouldn’t
have challenged myself to do more and to start writing every week like I always wanted to but I “never found the right place or time.”

Perhaps I wouldn’t have maximized my potential nor learned to juggle a lot more than what I thought I could; working independently, health and fitness, writing, reading more, doing charity work

Every single experience I’ve gone through in Mexico has been priceless although many times I push things a bit too far(dangerous situations). Even though I’ve always been one to hussle for more to do although I love monotony as it is those daily activities what keep me going.

Every single day that I’ve been in México has given me signs of my purpose. God manifests himself in many ways and I had never felt him so close, so intense, so direct, so clear and I am very grateful for being here once again as it has been a priceless experience that I would have never even come close to living all the things I’ve experienced.....

There will always be more, I will NEVER slow down; why should I? There will be plenty of time to rest when I die.
My list of goals this year was longer than ever and what makes me feel more satisfied and even more fulfilled is that every single one of them is being accomplished little by little.

It is the simple things in life that define who we are.....

There is nothing I find more exciting than.....

There is nothing I find more exciting than.....
finding the answer to something I don’t know
May 29, 2011
By: Gina Roman


For many years I’ve struggled with a very minor health problem which has been treated but not one single medication has helped so as I type, I’m doing a Google search of how and why this issue originated and how it can be prevented; one of the most fulfilling things in life is help oneself plus help others at the same time. This issue, a tooth ache and “sarcopenia.” (Sarcopenia derives from Greek roots, "sarx" meaning flesh and "penia" meaning loss - which means the loss of muscle fiber and coordination as the result of aging and the lack of movement; most runners develop sarcopenia at some point after wearing their muscles and joints out when running on cement), have been my Achilee’s hill; as a health aware individual these issues stress me out majorly but they are always left on the back burner because of a million excuses but this summer when things slow down a bit, I will take action and emancipate my body from all the pain and uncomfort it’s been through all these years.

Although as of February first I started a rather slow process of giving up a few bad habits such as chewing gum EVERY Day as I only aggravated my tooth ache, May first was the landmark for some HUGE changes that I talked about earlier in the year when I posted “Rules for Being Human.” One of those decisions was to give up meat for good, or at least for a long time – the reason being is because I want to challenge myself and see how much discipline my body is able to withhold.

I was reading a book about veggie/vegan lifestyle and I was disgusted and felt EXTREMELY guilty as I learned about all the downsides of consuming meat and all the unecessary torture we put animals through.
Most of the time my main focus is my outer shell, I nurture my body with the most liberating experiences in life; exercise and a healthy diet….. the internal aspect is always forgotten though so I have to find a balance. Lately I’ve been thinking about the holistic and spiritual aspects and what needs to be done to improve that area. In order to feel better internally and externally, we have to equalize every single aspect of our existence and avoid falling into monotony.

That is exactly how I’ve felt lately……For the last couple of weeks this tedious monotony has been striking me but the answer is lying in my grip that’s why there are a few projects to be done no later than this year. But before doing that, I’ve been forcing myself to make more time to read, to write and to rest.

Just last weekend when I posted I was feeling a little annoyed and overwhelmed because it seemed as if life was just about work, work, work but I was wrong. We can always squeeze in a little more if we really make an effort so this weekend I am feeling more refreshed.

So now that my mind is more refreshed I’ll concentrate on planning. Strategizing and planning always lead to many questions and every night when I lay restlessly in bed I question many things. Ever since I was a child I’ve always had this undaunted curiosity. “There is nothing I find more exciting than picking a Question that I don’t know the answer to and embarking on a quest for answers. It’s deeply satisfying to climb into the boat, we never know what we’ll find until we get there. Jim Colins in “Good to Great.”

So while I’m on this quest to find out the answers to my pain and freeing myself from it, I am also on a journey to find answers to a million things, such as; why do people in México say “salud” when someone sneezes? Why is a thumb up a sign of good, or approval?

With these questions in mind, I will head straight to bed and read some more so I can increase my knowledge, yet I don’t Intend to increase my knowledge in any way; my only attempt is try to lessen my ignorance and share my thoughts with the world. No estudio más por saber más, sino por ignorar menos.” Sor Juana Inés de la Cruz.

The Struggle is yet to Begin

The Struggle is yet to Begin
May 22, 2011
By: Gina Roman

The cause of my all day-lasting migraine must’ve either been the heat, the lack of sleep or the full moon last Sunday. Monday I woke up feeling like if a train had ran over me. All these mixed emotions were stirring inside me and as much as there is always something to do, I couldn’t help and fight melancholy because the most important little man in my life left to England.

I dropped off my brother and my nephew Alex at the airport on Monday night. Right before picking them up I went to a casting to work at Expo Belleza where I worked as a demo girl three years ago. There I was sitting thinking, “what am I doing here” I am so not into this anymore. I don’t like the vibes of plastic, makeup, high maintenance and superficial people. In the end I ended up telling my friend (the one who called me to go to the casting) that I was not up for doing it this year. I figured I’m getting too old plus that it is not my scene and there are more important priorities to set.

Tuesday was also a very hectic day as I’d had an awful Tooth ache since Sunday but I neglected to go to the dentist until I couldn’t bear the pain as I usually do. So I rushed to get checked, then I had to drive a colleague to the Tecnologico Superior de TLRDT to show him how to get there, to give him a run down of the school, to introduce him to the teachers and so forth. Coming back I realized that my fridge was empty and so I stopped and got some groceries.

By the time I got home it was about 9, then there were emails to reply, bags of groceries lying there, staring at me, demanding to be put away. And so the clock ticked to 10:00 o’clock when a a very close friend of mine called me. We had a long chat and she was telling me how I always demand too much of myself because I mentioned that I hadn’t accomplished enough in life. There are times when I don’t absorbe what people tell me but that night, I took in every single syllable she said and her words made me so happy that the next day I woke up feeling like I hadn’t felt in a LONG time.

(Wednesday, Thursday and Friday were just as overwhelming and on top of that, most of the time I only manage to squeeze in about five or six hours of sleep).
I guess pushing ourselves can be good and bad……One of the reasons why I always push myself and strive to be a better person is because I started doing many things late, or much later than many people. So that makes me believe in struggle and to maximize the power of “me.”

Many times I don’t want to even sit down for a minute to relax because I feel as if it were lost time but today and yesterday exhaustion caught up and even though there were a million things to do, a part of my days were spent in bed reading and napping.
I thought of how much I miss reading. Before I managed to read one book a month and now I can’t even manage to finish one book in 3 months! I figured that the time I used to read before, now it is used to write but I really resent that so just like I set a goal to write every Sunday, I am very determined to make time to read.
I’ve never been the sluggish type to sit in front of tv for endless hours, I love Keeping myself busy and doing productive things, in fact I just got back to the library project that was left behind a few months ago because of the lack of effort, communication and motivation.

This thought always pops in my mind, “if I were doing this and that and many things I would be much happier because I would feel a lot more fulfilled as a woman.” Although it takes me forever to get things done sometimes, I still do everything I’ve wanted with all my heart but I will always feel that it will NEVER be enough because there is so much to do and learn that it always feels as if I were in this endless race with time and getting caught up with knowdledge and goals to accomplish.

What many people don’t understand though is that every single stage in our life is about starting all over again and accepting all the changes, being born, becoming a toddler, learning to walk, learning to talk, to potty train and discovering the world, leaving babyhood behind, becoming a child, embracing adolescence, going to college and university and starting a career, becoming an adult, discovering love and getting married, forming a family, becoming a senior citizen, expiring.

It is exactly the way Cypress Hill states it in “Armada Latina. “La Lucha Recien empieza.” The struggle is just beginning.
So giving up is NOT an option as every day we approach is a new beginning, the struggle is yet to begin, and there are a million ways to change our lives for better.

“La Chingada and Sexland”

“La Chingada and Sexland”
May 16, 2011
By: Gina Roman



Two years ago when I gave life to my blog my writing was very sporadic, random and erratic as I lacked self-discipline and motivation. Now when I look back to November of 2010 when I started posting every week – sometimes twice a week, I think of how there will always be something to write about and share with the world that sometimes I wish there were more time to write; especially since the beginning of 2011, when there hasn’t been one single Sunday when I haven’t looked forward to sitting down and getting down to the needy greedy. I wanted to get writing to the level of my workouts, to a point where I could say, “writing to me is like breathing, I wouldn’t be able to pull through without it." writing is something I’ve always longed for as it makes me whole and it complements the woman I am now.

Every single day at every single moment, while I’m working out, when I’m teaching, conversing with someone, when I’m doing a translation or teaching,even the clothes that I wear and the objects that I carry, it is very exciting to absorbe and process all the thoughts and ideas from my surroundings because when I least expect it a writing topic comes up.

Right now at this precise moment I think and the more I reflect, the more amazed I get and realize how much knowledge I lack of my surroundings of my culture, my community, of the world and the universe, of myself and the more I think about how much knowledge I lack, the more ignorant I feel. That is one of the reasons why I love to manifest myself in writing and as I express my toughts, I watch as my fingers type. Every second I get more amazed as I observe the way each word creates a meaning and the meaning creates a purpose and the way the purpose creates an action and how that action creates a destiny and how each human being creates their own destiny. As for me that destiny is writing.

Now there isn’t a single drop of skepticism that I was meant to be a writer and I’d always wanted to give more life to my writing so I slowly have done so. In fact, I am in total agreement with this quote by Ayn Rand in the foreword of “The Fountainhead.” “I want to see, real, living, and in the hours of my own days, that glory I create as an illusion. I want it real, I want to know that there is someone, somewhere who wants it, too. Or else, what is the use of seeing it, and working and burning oneself for an impossible vision? A spirit, too, needs fuel as it can run dry.”

Among my list of “must haves,” I NEVER leave my house without my running shoes, my bottle of water, my timer, my gym bag, my notebook to jot down writing ideas, a good book to read, my radio (in case an interview comes up), my camera. Although these objects may not symbolize anything to many people they mean the world to me because they are my most powerful tools and official seals that mark my essence in this world.
As we speak about my surroundings that give me ideas and motivate me to write, about two weeks ago I had an interesting conversation in one of my classes about funny city names in Mexico and in other countries. I don’t remember exactly how we got started but I mentioned the fact that my sister in law lives a few kilometers away from a small town called Middlesex in England. We always like to tease her and tell her that she’s from Sexland.

When I was a child, I was very fortunate to grow up between the majic and beauty of two cultures. Among many multicultural events, I grew up on Punky Brewster and "El Chavo del 8.” There was an interesting character, “Jaimito el cartero,”(Jaimito the mailman) who was from this small town called “Tangamandapio.”
Little did I know that this small municipality is very real and is located in the northwest part of Michoacan!

It is always intriguing to know people’s names, last names and city names because when you think you’ve heard it and seen it all, something more ackward comes up.
That day I learned that there is a ranch called “La Chingada” outside of San Juan de Los Lagos in Jalisco. People also say that there is a another ranch with the same name in Colipa Veracruz It is hilarious because “vete a la chingada,” means go to hell. So next time I go to “La Chingada,” I hope people don’t think I’m going to hell.
Next time I will do a run down of funny city and town names in Mexico so we can get a good laugh.

Cinco de mayo

Cinco de mayo
May 8, 2011
By: Gina Roman




To reminiscence about 5 de mayo is to dig deep down to the true origin of this specific holiday. To this day many people are left with a huge question mark on their heads because the majority of Latinos and Mexicans and the rest of the population always seem to get Independence Day (Celebrated on Septemeber 16) and 5 de mayo mixed up.
I won’t get into depth with this holiday but what catches my attention is that 5 de mayo is more celebrated in the U. S. People go out in the streets flashing their Mexican flags, they go out for a drink with their friends or family, they carry small green, white and red flag shaped pins.
What’s funny though is that here in Mexico not a single soul celebrates this holiday. Other than the fact of school being out, everything else is pretty normal. In fact I had a very normal day… I’m trying to think where I was on 5 de mayo. Oh yes! I met a good friend of mine for breakfast who is very eager to learn English and she wants to start meeting with me more often so we can practice. After that I went to meet a very demanding client that I did a translation for. After making ten thousand changes and printing it four times, he was quite content with the work. Then I came home and carried on with my work as usual.

The night after 5 de mayo I talked to one of my three best lifetime friends and she was indeed under the impression that Independence Day takes place on 5 de mayo. She said that when people ask her why this holiday is so important, she replies that it’s because it is Independence Day. I wasn’t surprised so I decided to play a joke on her. I said, next time someone asks tell them that Mexico and whoever you want, fought for a kilo de tortillas but the reason why they had such a tough confrontation was because this wasn’t just any kilo de tortillas, it was a “special” kilo de tortillas because it was hand made on a tortillera.
That’s why this holiday has been so important ever since. She was laughing so hard that she couldn’t stop.